Relationships have changed a lot through the past, and we are no longer expected to be married to live with your partner. Still, moving in together is a big leap. Moving in is an important milestone in a relationship.
On one side it shows true commitment, and on the other, it can be a big test. As rewarding as living with someone is, you will suddenly spend most of your time together, share rent and house chores. Here are some tips that can help you make it less stressful:
Talk About Location
Moving in together can mean you’re renting a new apartment together. It can also mean you are going to your partner’s apartment or the other way around. Consider all the things you want to take with you and make sure you have enough space. Often, couples decide to start fresh and take a new apartment together. That can be a great idea, as you’re able to meet both of your needs and wishes by searching for a new home together.
The Money Talk
Most couples will need to talk about money when they move in together. You will share rent or mortgage, groceries, bills, and any other cost you spend for your home. It’s possible one person earns a lot more than the other, so it can make sense you don’t cut all your obligations exactly in half. On the other hand, some couples share everything and don’t even think about splitting bills. It’s important to discuss this topic with your partner to avoid future conflicts.
Another thing that can raise a lot of conflicts is chores. But it doesn’t have to be stressful. In general, there is something all of us hate doing the most. For example, you hate doing dishes, and your partner hates cooking. In such a case, it’s easy to agree on who does what. There will also be chores that no one likes doing, but it’s much easier if you divide them as soon as you move in. This way, no one will feel like they’re doing everything around the house.
Keep Some Things Seperate
When people move in, their things merge together. But to keep sane, it’s good to divide some parts of your apartment. For example, it makes more sense that each person has their own closet space. Additionally, each person should pick their “special spot”. This spot is something reserved for that person alone, and it can be anything from a computer corner to an exercise spot, or a nice couch where they will read and relax.
Expect Things Will Change
People sometimes underestimate how much their life and relationship will change once they live together with their partner. You should always keep the routines you love doing and should let your partner know about them. Still, you will also need to compromise, in order for you to keep functioning well. For example, if your partner loves to play video games in the evening and yells through his microphone and you like to spend the evening doing meditation and yoga – you will need to find a way to keep both people happy.
Make sure you still respect privacy and the need for alone time. That means it’s ok not to want to talk all the time, we all need some time for ourselves. Your relationship will change too, as none of you will be able to hide your flaws. Understand that everyone has flaws, and make peace with them. In the end, that’s not only a bad thing. Being completely open with one another takes your relationship to another level. It builds intimacy, trust, and love.