How To Maintain Your Relationship With Your Adult Children

It wasn’t effortless dealing with all the baby tantrums or teen hormones—although there are many resources for these stages of parenting—they help guide and alleviate the stress. When it comes to parenting adult children, not so many resources and ways are available. Dealing with adult children is overlooked and perceived as “not important,” yet this is one of the most challenging hurdles parents face. 

How To Maintain Your Relationship With Your Adult Children

You don’t exactly “parent” your adult children; instead, you create a healthy and vigorous relationship. While you assume that having an adult child would be simple, having a conversation or bond will be far more frustrating and complicated than you think! Here are five tips that can help you navigate your adult parenting style:

  1. Don’t Cross The Line

Remember: your children are adults already. They now have their own decision, gearing towards new careers, changing their perspective, and setting boundaries. It may appear like they’re detaching from your presence; that’s how it is. 

Sometimes, they don’t want to talk to you about sensitive issues, unlike before. There are instances where they refuse to return home for vacation or are no longer available for lengthy phone conversations and catch-ups. If you are a parent who held dear your relationship with children when they were younger, you may be hurt when you notice these changes. 

It’s essential to recognize that this increased distance and changes are typical for the adult stage of their life. You can respect them, still guide them, and be there whenever they need you. 

  1. Listen More Than You Speak

A usual teen scenario: you scold your children and discipline them if something goes wrong. This scenario might still be true with your adult children, but it needs some change because, again, their adults already. When you instil powerful words, they restrain and feel like they have no control over their own life. 

Even if you want to tell so much to your adult children for making foolish choices, you must bite your tongue and instead lend your ears, be there and guide them. Communication is also needed to make your relationship grow. Talk to them like an adult, not as if you’re talking to their teen version. This way, they will be more comfortable and open to conversation. 

  1. Make Some Room For Others In Their Life

You don’t want your adult children to fall into the wrong people. You’re protective and only doing your role as parents. However, you must understand that they will meet other people, may it be friends or a special someone. 

Among the others in their life, that special someone is the one you look out to. For instance, you are meeting your daughter’s boyfriend for the first time, be open-minded and kindhearted. Try to get to know them without being aggressive and judgemental; unless you notice something is off, do your best to accept them.

  1. Open Up

Vulnerability is the last thing that parents want to show to their children. All the time, parents want to appear strong and authoritative, and everything is in the grasp of their hands. That is not the case for maintaining relationships with your adult children. 

Open up and ask your children to assist you in learning how to be a good parent and companion to them as adults. This method eliminates misunderstandings and awkwardness as both you and your children navigate a strong tie.

  1. Have Fun!

Parents presume that bonding with their children is too childish as they are adults already. In the same way, children have no time to bond with their parents anymore. However, spending time with your adult children and doing things you love is a way to have a strong relationship. Devote time to doing activities together. If you’re hesitant that it will be awkward, don’t be! You’ll never know what you’ll discover unless you try!

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